Everyone has weeks where they’d rather be anywhere else but at work. You find yourself staring out the window, wishing you were in the sunshine and wondering when your motivation will return from war.
If that’s you and you need something to get you through the daily grind, we’ve found 30 memes that will speak to you on a spiritual level. And if you love your job please go away, these are not for you.
30) Good morning to people who don’t look at or speak to me only.
Why so loud? Why so much energy? If you want to speak to me I need to have had three coffees, two breakfasts and it needs to be past noon.
29) Stop, Brenda you’re too funny!
No one knows this feeling more than the ice packs I have to put on my jaw at the end of the day. The upside is the free workout, so thank you to my dull colleagues for making sure I never have to enter a gym.
28) Hibernation sounds wonderful
At this rate I’m going to have to start paying plastic tax for the bags under my eyes. Petition for humans to adopt the hibernation cycles of bears.
27) Bring back office cubicles
Parenting isn’t for the faint of heart. And yes my team members might as well be children. Put me through to whoever invented open-plan offices, I just wanna talk.
26) Doing nothing is tiring
In my defence, thinking about everything on my to-do list is extremely exhausting. Breaks are important. Self-care always.
25) Every. Damn. Time.
It’s like my body knows we don’t get up that early. But hey at least I’m awake. And if I don’t look at the clock then no time passes and I am not late. I don’t make the rules.
24) Dreaming of the day…
I can’t believe I went through nearly two decades of education just so I could have four decades of work so I can have one decade of no work. I’m ready for bingo nights and Antiques Roadshow now.
23) Life is one long distraction
Thank you endless calls, meetings, conversations, coffee breaks and brainstorming sessions for ensuring that nothing ever actually gets accomplished.
22) Her rules not mine
I may be old enough to be a parent myself but I’m not ready to let go of the one excuse that has never let me down. Take it up with my mum if you have a problem.
21) The most important meal of the day
My body is crying out for water. Just a drop. One morsel of hydration. But my heart? My heart says iced coffee. For every meal.
20) Sorry not sorry
If you think I’m miserable and sarcastic I promise I’m not, I probably just don’t like you and don’t want to speak to you.
19) Have I mentioned I’m tired?
Imagine having the capacity to take time off work. Imagine being able to switch off in that time. Imagine being able to delete screen time from your life. Sleep? What a concept!
18) It’s just my RBF
No I’m just extremely unapproachable which is probably why I have no friends and I’m single. Thank you for pointing it out.
17) If I’m irritated, you must be irritating
I used to have a good attitude until I was forced to spend time with people who ask me if I’ve fallen down when I wear ripped jeans and never stop talking about their kids. Also I don’t want to be here.
16) Work is one big group project
My posture is appalling because my back is breaking from the weight of carrying my entire team.
15) Now playing: Tainted Love
Once I learn cardio it’s over for these hoes. You can watch me disappear over the horizon and I’ll send you a postcard from the most remote island I can find.
14) My new get rich quick scheme
I’m replacing the swear jar at work with a new jar for this occasion. All proceeds go to me and if all goes well I should have enough to retire in the Bahamas by next Tuesday.
13) Gone in the blink of an eye…
I’d also settle for 8 hours of work going as quickly as 8 hours of sleep. But to be honest I don’t even know what that would feel like because I never get 8 hours.
12) The exhaustion is real
I actually think tiredness might just be one of my personality traits and it will always be with me. The tiredness comes from within. It is in my soul, not dependent on my sleep.
11) Warning: battery low
The other 10% is half thinking about what I want for dinner and half wishing my colleagues would stop asking my opinion on things I don’t care about.
10) Karens will be Karens
I love it when people try to get a reaction out of me at work. The joke’s on you my friend, I am already dead inside.
9) I’m fluent in sarcasm
Yes, there is such a thing as a stupid question. Save yourself the time and embarrassment and Google it. I am not a search engine.
8) This hits different
I can’t even explain the existential crisis this one sent me into. I miss the days where a good night’s sleep wasn’t a rare occurrence. How does it feel to be well-rested? I honestly couldn’t tell you.
7) Please do not look in my coffee flask
Whoever said it’s not acceptable to drink when you’re working? I’m sure the French do it. The Beatles definitely did it and they did alright. It gets the creative juices flowing.
6) I won’t be taking questions at this time
Some people save lives for a living. Others apprehend criminals. I make spreadsheets and listen to my coworkers talk about their relationships and yes it is extremely taxing.
5) If you insist!
My colleagues are the reason I have no money and am always hungover. They are a bad influence. The problem is definitely them. It 100% has nothing to do with me.
4) Home sweet bed
Socialising? I don’t know her. Now nothing thrills me more than kicking off my shoes, lying horizontally on the sofa and not moving for five hours. This is especially true for key workers right now but even for those working from a makeshift desk setup, the highlight of my day is doing absolutely nothing.
3) Working from home has ruined my excuses
Zoom meetings have forced me to get creative with my excuses, each more unrealistic than the last. There was a mysterious knock at the door. A pipe burst in my kitchen. The dog soiled the carpet and I had to clean it up. At least I can still excuse lateness by saying I broke down. It’s just no longer about my car.
2) My acting skills are critically acclaimed
I’d like to thank my parents for their high expectations, my teachers for always reminding me how average I am and of course my manager who never lets me forget that if I want a pay rise I have to act like I care. I couldn’t do it without you.
1) Time is a social construct.
Minutes, hours, what’s the difference really? My brain says I’m done and my body says I am done so I am done. See you tomorrow.